06 October 2023

Scoffing in Tongues

Laugh emoji, tongue emoji, and scoff emoji

A roving evangelist optimistically approaches a group of 3 snarky guys, hoping to make converts: "Excuse me friends, have you ever experienced speaking in tongues?"

Guy 1: "No. But I'd rather stick to my routine of thinking in brains."


Guy 2: "Personally, I rather like hearing in ears."


Guy 3: "That's all fine, but for my money seeing in eyes is best".


They are all getting wound up now, laughing and goading one another while the long-suffering evangelist adopts a patient, pleasant, martyr-like expression. He regrets approaching the young men. But is imagining the rewards he is getting in heaven for being ridiculed for his faith.


Guy 2: "Although I'm pretty sure I've experienced walking in feet…"


Guy 1: "Oh, yeah! I forgot that time I was smelling in noses! That was awesome!"


Guy 3: (with the inevitable slide into more edgy territory) "When I'm tired, I think it is sublime to be sitting in butts!" (That gets a huge laugh from the other two)


The evangelist is getting rather uncomfortable and the three smart alecs are pretty much just raucously entertaining themselves at this point. He begins to look around for better prospects.


Guy 1: (who always is first to plunge into the gutter): "Oh, wait guys! (he can hardly speak because he is laughing too hard). What about copulating in…."


The evangelist decidedly tunes out the remaining words as he has moved on to strike up a conversation with an elderly lady feeding some pigeons.


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